Convey
by Lillium-Nakano
Summary: I stood there, pure and completely bare for her to see. Easily, I succumbed to the influence. The world would see me bare. AOI x CHIE CH 4 is up! Read & Review
1. Prologue

Hello! I decided to start the ball on my new project. I ended up doing another Chie x Aoi, simply for the fact that there really isn't enough of them around. To be honest, they deserve a little more love than what they're getting. The two characters are amazing together and I really enjoy the freedom for their personalities because the two weren't completely developed in the actual series.

The inspiration for this story actually comes from a relationship I had (of course some of it's going to be exaggerated for fun story purposes, but you get the point). I decided to place this story after High School, mainly because I wanted to take the two in a more older perspective rather than my last fic that had them placed in the angsty teen perspective. I guess the whole moral will be that even after high school you're still stuck with trying to find yourself and you're still fighting through that journey of knowing who you are and who you love.

As always I hope my writing progressively gets better, please give this chapter a read and review it for me because I'm always open to advice. Sooo enough babbling and let's get the show on the road. I think I'm going to just post a short prologue to see how the concept of this story will work with the readers, and if I get positive comments for it, then I'll know this plot will be worth it.

This fic is rated PG-13 or Teen for sexual themes and probably a bit of language and sex humor thrown in.

* * *

  
Prologue

It was sudden, kind of like someone randomly jumped up and slapped me in the face. Maybe it didn't have the initial sting as if someone really did, but it was just as confusing and almost as...painful.

Her lips were pressed tightly against mine. She was determined to get her answer. My eyes were wide with shock. First, because a strange woman who I had said two sentences to, grabbed the sides of my head and pulled me into a hard kiss. Secondly, the real shock was that I really enjoyed it. I didn't want her to pull away.

So I complied. I allowed my lips to relax and mold against hers. I closed my eyes and focused on the heat between us or the pounding in my chest. I didn't want it to end, but of course I knew it had to.

She pulled away. Her cheeks were flushed, either out of embarrassment or excitement I wasn't too sure. Her eyes were locked into mine, and at that moment I felt like I knew this person my entire life. I didn't even know her name.

Her long brown hair shaped her face, contrasting the color of her skin and eyes. I looked through those eyes and into her soul.

"Why did that... feel so right?" She asked me. Her voice was a melody that whistled in my ears. It was the chorus of angels that weighed onto my heart.

I cupped her chin with my two fingers and pulled her face into mine again. This time it was assured. There was confidence in me as I pulled her against me.

She broke my kiss by pulling away and facing her head to the ground.

Now the good feelings dispersed, dragging my heart to the depths with them.

"I'm sorry," she whispered. I shook my head.

How in the world could anyone be sorry for something that beautiful?

She stood up and gave a deep bow.

"I'm sorry," she repeated. "I have to go."

I felt a rain drop hit my head. I tilted my head up towards the sky.

"What's your name?" I asked her quietly, probably almost inaudible.

She hesitated, probably because she was unsure. After all, I was a complete stranger to her, so I understood the pause before her answer.

"Aoi." I smiled as rain began to pour down onto me.

"My name is Chie; it's very nice to meet you," I said. I wondered if my smile looked as empty as I felt. I heard her take her leave.

I didn't move from that bench, even though the rain poured heavily onto my face.

My heart was complete and in the same four minutes, utterly destroyed. I would probably never see that girl again, and knowing that made my chest feel so incredibly heavy.

Of course I wanted to know why the hell she did that so abruptly, but I wanted to know even more who she was, and why she chose me.

I heard the cackling of thunder and I smirked.

"Damn foreshadowing," I chuckled.

* * *

Fuck. I just made out with an absolute stranger, and a GIRL no less. I was scrambling to get my keys for my car, but my hands were shaking so bad that I couldn't get the damn thing to get into the hole. I tried to replay what had happened in my head.

She was.. very cute. I kissed her. She kissed back. I'm pretty sure sparks flew.

It was the most bizarre sensation I think I've ever felt. I knew that it was so damn wrong yet it felt so God damn right. I don't think my heard could have punched against my chest any harder than it did. She must have felt the same way, because even after my kiss she pulled me in for round two. And I let her.

Fuck.

I banged my head against my steering wheel.

"Chie," I whispered. I liked her name, it felt so warm when it was released from my lips.

I'll probably never see you again, Chie.

But damn, I really hoped I would.  


* * *

End Prologue

Yeaaah sorry it's just a tiny tease to see if it catches the interest. If the project continues I already have next chapter's outline thought up, and it'll give an explanation on what the hell happened.

Oh and for those who noticed, yeah I tinkered with Aoi's personality on this one. She's a little more extroverted than how I made her personality in my last fic. I figured that I wanted Chie to be the intellectual introvert, and make Aoi the fun twenty year old. We'll see how it goes.

Thanks for reading like always and give me some feedback.

-Lillium


	2. Regret

So now that school is coming to a close, I've personally decided to continue on with this project in hopes that it will be better than my last. I also want to do some work on my own and see how it turns out, so I'll definitely keep you up to date if I have any ideas stretched out. Thank you to the few people who have added me to their favorite authors list, I don't know if I deserve it since updates have been so scarce but I promise I'll try harder now that school is out! (Especially if this fic hits it off)

Enough about me, let's get to the girl lovin'. I've created the outline for the fic (or at least a rough draft), and I'm actually enjoying the story concept and how the characters are developing. Once you finish reading, if you want more please let me know by commenting or at least favoring the story, because I'm still unsure if this is the new project I want to stick with, so please! Leave me some feedback and tell me if it sucks or not.

Disclaimer: I don't own shit.

* * *

Chapter 1- Regret

I traced my finger along his forehead gently, making sure not to wake him up. His breath was rugged as he exhaled. I simply stared at him, contemplating everything that went on in my dumbass head. My thoughts kept backtracking to that day with the girl on the bench, and for some reason the harder I tried to forget about it, the more I thought about that scene. Even my eyes could see that it was poetic, but incredibly stupid on my part. I found out my answer, and I didn't like it one bit.

I leaned into his face and pressed my lips against his. Time seemed to pause for a short moment. There were no sparks. There were no fireworks, and there was no music that burst from a chorus. His lips were a little chapped and his breath stunk of morning with a little hint of last night's beer. It wasn't anything like what I had experienced with that girl. Chie.

"Good morning to you too," his eyes were opened and his lips formed in a smirk. Inwardly, I sighed. He had no clue.

"Good morning," I whispered. As I tried to pull my face away he cuffed my chin to put me through round two. I felt my stomach churn.

It was a strange feeling, because he has been my boyfriend since high school. We moved in together, and I've kissed him plenty of times. However, each of those times seemed to have been so passive for me, they really didn't hold too much of a true meaning. They were just statements.

He would lean in for the kiss, stating: I want you to be mine.

I only complied by allowing our lips to touch, saying: I don't really care.

And that's how I started feeling our relationship. It was a simple one that I kept for the term "couple". I didn't understand how all my friends could bawl their eyes out over some guy dumping them, when really if Reo dumped me I don't really think I would feel as much. Sure, I'd be losing one of my best friends, but in terms of the relationship, so what?

"I'll make you breakfast," I said when he tried to pull me closer to his bare chest. He chuckled and sucked me into an embrace even though I was trying to climb out of bed. He worked out quite often, and consequentially became fairly muscular. A lot of his actions always made me feel like he was trying to remind me that he was stronger than I am.

"Breakfast can wait," his voice was deep and husky and his breath blew across my face. "Think you have time before work to spend some time together?" His grin reached all the way across his face, and my stomach churned at the thought.

"Hold on cowboy, my stomach is a little upset." His face crunched up a bit and I could even feel him pull away from me. Hell, my stomach felt fine and I didn't even have work today, but I thanked God for the excuse.

"You wanna go make breakfast?" Heh. Typical male.

"Yeah," I replied and headed towards the kitchen.

This entire concept was hard to wrap my head around. I was always so passive with him, just doing whatever he wanted whenever he wanted, because I figured that's what all couples did. I didn't think you were really suppose to FEEL anything, I just thought all that emotion crap was all exaggerated bullshit for Hallmark cards. But when I kissed that girl… Everything seemed to have clicked. The bells started ringing, fireworks busted and all that shit. I've only known her for two sentences, yet after we kissed I wanted to pounce on her.

I had to see her again.

"Reo, I'm going to go and grab us some bagels," I yelled out to him. I heard him yell something muffled, but didn't really care to hear it, so I grabbed my jacket and slipped through the door without him arguing about it.

I traced my footsteps into the park. I wasn't as rushed as the last time, and I wasn't in desperate need to find my answer. I knew that I had to see her again.

Right before we kissed on that same day Reo asked me to marry him. I don't blame him, we were practically married and we've been together for years now. We never fight and are overall pretty comfortable with each other, so the idea was bound to come up soon. The thought though… made me sick to my stomach. So I rushed to that bench and kissed a total stranger to try and prove that what I felt with him was love. I learned the exact opposite.

I strolled up to that very bench to see it empty. I turned my head to look around. Perhaps I was trying to find her, but what did I expect? That she was some lesbian goddess that was to wait at this bench for all eternity and show confused girls the path of awesome making out heaven? No, I saw a plain green metal bench.

It really wasn't even that great of a bench for all the magic that happened on it. Paint was chipped in the corners, and the grass around it was too long and out of control. Honestly, it didn't feel very magical now.

"Because there's something missing," I murmured out loud. I stretched my legs out across the bench and looked towards the sky.

I couldn't believe that these emotions were so confusing. In the movies everything always just seemed to work out.

I sighed and left the rusty hunk of metal to continue to whither in the sun.

Right then I told myself that I was probably never going to see that girl again.

I might be exaggerating now, but after I stated that very fact I felt a little piece of me die.

"I guess I better get the bagels."

* * *

Her legs were sprawled out on the green bench, and my eyes couldn't help but trail every inch of them, up to her incredibly short skirt.

"Chie," she whispered to me. It sounded almost like a command. I followed the directions of the voice and slid on top of her.

Aoi's eyes burned into mine, and a small smirk was apparent on her beautiful lips. I bent my head down and claimed those soft lips as mine. Our faces parted and her lips opened to release a small whisper.

"CHIE!" The voice was masculine and loud, and I couldn't help but stare at her, confused. "HELLOOOO?" My eyes ripped open to see Tate's idiotic face staring at me.

"What the fuck do you want?" I asked him, clearly annoyed of him waking me up in my uh, pleasant slumber.

"Aren't you supposed to be working on that article? If you mess up, Fujino's going to make you model for her," he snickered at his own joke.

"It's already done, I'm just waiting for her to get into her office," I tried to make sure the tone in my voice was clearly calling him a dumbass, because I am really the only one in this office who turns things in on time.

"Well don't fall back into your sex dream, because she arrived about ten minutes ago."

I grumbled. "It wasn't a sex dream; it was about rainbows and kittens." I felt my face grow bright red. Nothing could be more embarrassing to have your co-workers taunt you for a sex dream that you had in your own cubicle. I snatched up the rough draft of my article.

"Right, right," he said dismissively. "By the way, who's Aoi?" I ignored his chuckles as I headed to Fujino's office with my face as red as a baboon's ass, which coincidently, is how I felt at the moment.

I knocked on her door.

"Come in, come in, no need to knock when you have an appointment."

I did so and laid the papers on her desk.

Shizuru Fujino had an aura about her in which automatically you felt like you had to always have to be on your best behavior and give your full attention and respect to her. It's intimidating at first, until her eyes sparkle and her mouth curves up in a teasingly smile.

"I'm sure it's good work, like always."

"Thank you, Fujino-sama."

"How many times have I told you to call me Shizuru, Chie-kun?"

"Probably a hundred now."

She sighed and smiled. "Well if you prefer Onee-sama," she brought her hand up and chuckled at seeing my expression.

"Have you given any thought to becoming a model for next month's issue?" She smoothly asked me. "Your pay will be doubled for the time being, and I'll even consider a raise."

"I'm comfortable being a writer, thank you." I gave her my famous nervous smile.

"My, my, what a shame then. We won't be able to do that specific topic in an issue until you agree." Her voice sounded as pressuring as the statement did. However, a small knock on the door interrupted the awkward pause in our conversation, and Natsuki Kuga poked her head in. Immediately, Fujino's expression changed to sheer happiness.

"Uh, sorry, am I interrupting anything?"

"No, no, Chie was just on her way out," Shizuru hopped up from her desk and took Natsuki's hand. "Weren't you, Chie-kun?"

Feeling quite literally pushed out, I decided to call it a day and gather my things up.

"Aw man, Kuga's here," Tate stated with a huge grin. "I need to put a camera in Fujino-sama's office for Kuga-san's visits."

"And I'm sure Shizuru would rip your balls off and force you to eat them," I replied, rolling my eyes. His eyebrows furrowed for a moment, seeming like he was actually considering that to be a very valid possibility. I waved to him goodbye, and headed out of the building towards the park. Ever since Aoi kissed me, I've been going back to that bench after work just to check and make sure she's not waiting for me. So far she has in my dreams, but has been a no show in reality. I know it's a stupid thing to do, seeing as how I had no idea whether or not she ever really was coming back, but part of me wanted her to so badly, and that was worth the detour home.

Once I caught the bench in my view, I noticed that this night was another disappointment. There was no sign of her. I sighed and went back on the trail towards home.

I knew it was pretty pathetic to keep coming back to that spot. I knew that the probability of me ever even seeing her again was highly unlikely.

Knowing that made me feel awfully alone.

I sighed.

"At least I have my dreams."

* * *

Finally! Chapter one! I promise the chapters will get longer; right now I'm just creating the setting and base of the story. In the near future, I'm going to be posting two versions of certain chapters. The PG-13 version will be posted on here, and the rated R version will be posted on my Livejournal that can be found on my profile page, so be sure to look out for that.

As always, I'd love to hear any feedback (even negative stuff!) and I'm still going to see whether or not this project snags. I have an outline for it and I'm fairly impressed with it, but I'm not too sure if there's going to be much of an appeal, so definitely comment and let me know if you want this story to continue.

Thanks for reading and until next time!

Lillium


	3. Small World

Well I still kept getting reviews even after I thought the story's fan base died out, so to appease the people who consistently are asking for it to continue, I've decided to post up another chapter.

This chapter becomes a little more mature in the beginning, but nothing too bad. Rated PG-13 mostly for cussing and sexual themes.

I don't own anything.

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Chapter 2- Small World

"Come on babe we'll have fun," Reo pursued as he nibbled at my neck.

"You may think falling on your ass with a sheet of ice under you may be fun, but I certainly don't," I grumbled as I flipped through my book.

"Come on, Aoi, we used to play with the guys all the time, why not now?"

"Because I'm the one who gets my ass kicked because you suck at ice hockey," I turned another page.

"That's not true."

I looked up at him with my eyebrow raised.

"Okay, maybe it is, but it'll be fun. I promise you," he nudged me with his forehead and pouted. I expressed my dismay with a sigh but agreed to go. His face lightened like a small boy seeing a huge bike on Christmas morning.

He pulled my book away from me and laid me down, his weight on top of me. I cursed silently. My brain ran through the list of recent excuses in sought of a new one. I couldn't come up with one by time his tongue was in my mouth, so once again I went with the flow and allowed it. His lips trailed down my neck and I tried my hardest to seem interested.

I never liked sex. The entire concept of being near that "thing" disgusted me. I faked and faded away to make him happy so that he didn't find out that there was something wrong with me, but lately it was so hard to make it convincing.

Thank God Reo wasn't the brightest man in the world. He didn't have a clue. With his grunts echoing in my ear I was desperate to get away. I let my mind wander, letting itself recover. In his place I imagined her. Her hands were so delicate and her lips were so welcoming when she kissed me. I wrapped my arms around her and held on.

Please don't go, I told her in my head. She smiled at me, eyes sparkling.

"I love you," I whispered to her, wanting to test the words out to see if they fit. I don't think a better sentence could have been said. There weren't three words in any language that could have expressed my feelings any better.

She smiled and returned that sentence. But it wasn't her; it was his voice and his smile.

"I love you too babe," he said. Apparently he was finished and didn't notice my mental absence. It was disgusting. As long as he had my body it didn't matter if my mind was there.

I rolled over and almost felt completely dead inside.

I wanted her to hold me, but I'd probably never see her again. Thinking of that, tears blurred my vision.

"We're going to have fun tomorrow, I promise," he said on the other side of the bed.

Right.

* * *

"Why in the hell would you think I'd be good at ice hockey," I grumbled as Tate gave me his best puppy dog eyes.

"Well uh… 'cus you're … you know," I sighed and glared at him.

"I know you're not going to say I'd make a good ice hockey player because I'm gay."

"Come on Chie! I'm sure you'll be fine. My friend is bringing his chick along to play and she kicks ass!"

"What do I get out of it?"

He scratched his head.

"How about I buy lunch tomorrow?"

"Buy lunch for a week and you got a deal," I corrected him.

"Fine…" He mumbled. "But you better be decent."

"You're lucky I used to play with my older brother,"

"Awesome, I can finally kick Reo's ass," Tate gave me a huge grin.

"Who the hell is that?" I asked, barely interested as I went back to typing up a recent article.

"A friend of mine, the one that has a girl that kicks total ice hockey ass," he leaned back in his chair with his hands behind his head. "Come to think of it, she IS pretty hot too… You might like bumping into her on the ice." He gave me a small wink.

"Straight girls. Gross."

"Tate-kun, shouldn't you be working on that article I told you to start writing? Hmm?" Fujino was gripping the back of his chair behind him. He jumped at her sudden appearance and turned bright red.

"S-sorry Fujino-san, right away," he muttered and turned his chair toward his computer.

She gave a smile at me.

"Great work Chie-kun with last week's column, however, I'd love for you to help me with my project again, I'm willing to triple your pay," her eyes burned into mine. For a second I was afraid she was going to force me to model for her.

"Maybe later, Fujino-sama," I faced my computer and started typing again, bright red.

"Such a shame," she muttered and took her leave. I let out a sigh of relief.

"She totally wants your masculine ass," the top of Tate's head peeked over my cubicle wall as he spoke in a soft whisper.

"Shut the hell up and finish your work for once."

I finished up my article and shut down the computer. I left the office quietly so that Shizuru didn't try to attack me on the way out. There was no way that I was going to model for her butch article. Not only did she want to show my goods but it was demeaning as well. She could raise my pay up to seven times higher than it is and I still wouldn't. It isn't like I need the money anyway.

A breeze flew through my air, brushing against me, making my body shiver. I zipped up my jacket and kept to my destination. The grass of the park crunched under my shoes as I passed the bench. I spent an extra 15 minutes each day walking past that spot on the way to and from work just to make sure. I wasn't too sure how much longer I'd keep it up, because I was pretty sure I'd never see her again.

I was getting used to the disappointment of not seeing her each day. By the time I crawled into bed and turned off my bedside lamp, I didn't even think of her.

When I fell asleep, I don't even think I dreamt of her. Perhaps it was finally time for my mind to recover from what happened on the bench.

Perhaps.

* * *

I never liked Reo's friend. His name was Tate and he was a loud, obnoxious ass who made perverted comments every possible chance he got. Luckily for me I only had to tolerate him when we played ice hockey.

"Today's going to be the day when I beat your ass down, Reo," Tate yelled as we went through the entrance of the rink. Immediately my hair stood on end to meet the sudden drop in temperature and I could already feel a headache coming on from the mere sound of his voice.

"Is that so?" Reo yelled back. "You shouldn't be so sure when I brought my secret weapon. She's going to remind you of how much she kicked your balls in the ice."

I let out a sigh. And so began the battle of testosterone. Soon they'll resort to "yo momma" jokes and then repeatedly beat their chests at one another while howling like the monkeys they are.

"Hah, but I have my own secret weapon. A co-worker of mine is a star player and she'll run circles around Miss Fiancé over there."

At least there's some hope that this won't be completely miserable if there's going to be some more estrogen here to balance out the raging man-hormones. I stood by Reo as he and Tate caught up their trash talk, until Tate looked up and waved to his other team mate.

"Yo, Chie! You're late!" The hairs on my neck stood on end. I took in a sharp intake of breath when I turned to see her. Her eyes met mine and were equally shocked. I felt my heart skip a beat and my stomach turned. There she was. Literally, the girl of my dreams. She stopped at a complete halt, staring at me with disbelief. She was thinking the same thing I was.

I never thought I'd see you again.

She snapped out of our little trance faster than I could, and walked to our group.

"Sorry I'm late," she mumbled trying not to make eye contact with me, "Traffic can be a bitch."

"Reo, Aoi, this is Chie. She's a writer for the 'zine we work for. Chie, this sorry bunch that we're going to demolish is Reo and his fiancé, Aoi."

I could see the slightest twitch around her eye when she heard the word "fiancé". Immediately I felt guilty as if I was caught cheating.

"It's nice to meet you, Tate said you were a pro," Reo stretched out his hand towards her with his "swooning" smile as he called it. "I didn't know such pretty girls put up with him as a co-worker." He added in.

I wanted to puke. My face grew hot from my fiancé hitting on the chick that I fantasized about when he had sex with me.

"I don't know about that, pretty boy, but we are going to grind your face into some ice today," she smiled at him and shook his hand, briefly glancing at me from behind her black-rimmed glasses.

"The girl uniforms and pads are in the girls' locker room, so let's get changed and get this game on."

I saw the confused look on her face.

"Pads? Uniforms?" She asked.

Reo chuckled and rested his hand on her shoulder.

"We play for real, babe."

My fists clenched. He was hitting on her. In front of his fiancé he was… hitting on the girl that I saw first.

"Right." She picked up his hand off her shoulder and let it drop down. She looked up at me. "So then, Aoi, want to show me where?"

I nodded; my face was beet red and started walking towards the girl's locker room. My throat was clenched tight, making me unable to mutter a single word.

I opened up the locker that had the uniforms and pads in it, and gave her a set.

"You don't talk much, do you?" She asked me, as I separated my uniform.

"Uh… no." I was able to mutter out.

I took a look behind my shoulder to see her slip off her shirt, revealing her mostly bare back, with just the mere straps of a sports bra sitting on her shoulders. If this were an anime or some manga I'm sure my nose would erupt into a violent nose-bleed, but I merely stared, mouth gaped slightly open at her perfect curves and the way her pants fit so very loosely on her hips. I forced my head back forward and stumbled into my pads and uniform. She finished when I did and looked at me and giggled.

"W-what?" I asked.

She shook her head and grinned at me. Her eyes were practically sparkling behind her glasses.

"You just look really adorable," she said and chuckled.

I tried to hide my face so she couldn't see how much I was blushing and headed for the door. I prayed to God that I'd be able to make it through tonight without having my head explode from her presence. She had so much charisma around her that it was making it super difficult to talk.

When we walked out of the locker room, Reo and Tate whistled at us.

"Man you two look smoking," Tate exclaimed and Chie elbowed him in the gut. I couldn't help but let out a giggle and a mental thanks to her.

"All right ladies; let's get the show on the road. Tate that includes you."

He was still recovering from Chie's elbow and nodded.

"Right, let's have the girls do the puck-off thing while I catch my breath," Tate threw a puck at us. She set it down in the middle between us and got ready.

"I'll try and go easy on you," she up at me while she was crouched down. I smiled and bent down as well.

"Not necessary, I'll make sure I don't make you cry," I teased.

"So you do talk," she stated.

"Occasionally," I muttered. Then in almost a shout, I exclaimed, "Go!"

I clutched the puck with my stick and skated towards Tate guarding their goal. She sped in front of me and with a grin, clashed her hockey stick against mine and hit the puck behind me towards our goal.

She was fast, and good. In my defense I was incredibly distracted as she made her way towards Reo guarding our goal. I couldn't keep my eyes above her waist, not looking at her ass. She lifted the stick up and with a SLAM it went past Reo with little interference.

Reo muttered a cussword or two and hit the puck to me.

"Gotta' be faster," she yelled at me and winked.

I let out a sigh of air and smiled. This was actually going to be more fun than I expected.

It ended up being a brutal fight between her and me with the boys just staying at the goals, mouths agape and staring at us continuing the battle. At a point it got a bit rough when I "accidentally" pushed her against the side wall. We got so caught up in beating one another that we hardly noticed pushing against each other, and against the wall. I think the guys were getting more of a show than they expected.

I was about to go for a swing towards her goal, but she went in front of me and gave a small push to get the puck away, but instead caught her skate into mine, lost balance and ended up landing on top of me with an "OOMF". I opened my eyes and immediately forgot to breathe when I saw her face dangerously close to mine, blushing. Her hot breath embraced my face and I could tell in her eyes her heart stopped beating just like mine.

In another world I would have smiled and lifted my head to meet her lips. I would let my being mold itself into hers to create this perfect moment. This would be part of a perfect world. Reo would be out of my life, and I'd finally be everything I'd wanted to be. Not just a fiancé. Not just a house wife. Not just a Mom. Looking in her eyes almost made me see that this was what it was like to be in a perfect moment in the perfect world.

But of course, there is no such thing as a perfect moment or a perfect world.

"Woah, you guy's all right? You took a nasty spill," Tate chuckled.

Chie immediately moved off of me and Reo helped me back up to my feet.

"I guess we'll call it now, you guys win," he muttered and was looking at me strangely.

"Hah! In your face!" Tate did some immature hand motion but I was too busy focusing on Chie's smile as she took off her glove and reached her hand out.

"Good game," she said, softly.

I shifted my hand out of my glove and touched her bare skin. It was almost like a jolt of lightning between us, our hands even flinched back. She took my hand in hers and shook it, still grinning.

"Well let's return our uniforms and get into some normal clothes," she said. Reo put his arm around my shoulder and pulled me closer against him.

"It's all right, we'll return the stuff tomorrow, we gotta' get going," Reo said fairly forcefully.

"Well I hope we can do this again sometime, it was fun," Chie said rather softly. It was almost inaudible. Her eyes kept locked in mine.

"Yeah," I whispered.

Reo tugged me away from the other team and headed back towards the entrance.

My head stayed turned and my eyes kept on hers. I wanted to somehow communicate how much fun I had today, and that I wanted to see her again. I didn't want her to disappear.

She smiled at me and it almost seemed sad.

Mentally, I thanked her.

I thanked her for making me feel more alive and real than I have my entire life.

* * *

Not too bad of size for an update I suppose. I'll start working on the draft for the next chapter shortly, and hopefully have an extra update by the beginning of next week.

Also, if you check my livejournal in my profile page I'll start posting extra bonus chapters and more "mature" version of these chapters or scenes. (I'm going to put a little more mature version of a scene in this chapter very soon, so add me to friends on livejournal or something.

As always please leave a review for me, with any extra criticism or comments (they make me feel all warm and fuzzy inside).

Until next time!

.Lillium.


	4. Merge

And once again I'm back with another chapter of Convey. I want to thank everyone for the encouragement you've given me with your comments, because I wouldn't be writing anymore without them! Once again you guys can go to my profile and get my livejournal link, in which you can find bonus chapters and more "mature" versions of these chapters, along with original work of mine and an overall blog. I am going to be updating it more, so definitely keep a look out for it if you're a fan of my writing, because I have a piece of original work that I'm going to be working on as well as Convey. So you can find out all of that on my livejournal which can be found in my profile page on this site.

Anywho, onto chapter three.

This story is rated Teen (PG13) for sexual content, lots of language, and overall hawt stuff. I do not own Mai Hime or any of its characters.

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Chapter 3- Merge

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It was incredibly insane how Aoi was all I thought about. Everything that was processed in my head inevitably turned out to be something involving her. Even when I brush my teeth I always wonder how she brushes hers. Or when I eat breakfast I wonder what her favorite meal was, and then I have to remind myself that it doesn't matter because I'll never have a chance to be with her. She was about to be married to a jerk that couldn't take his eyes off my ass. If only he knew that I would rather have his fiancé gaping at my assets instead of his wannabe suave eyes.

As I left work for the day, I took my usual detour to head for the park. My feet walked more quickly than usual, and I was almost breaking out in a run because for some reason I knew I had to get there. I stopped short and simply gazed towards the bench.

The sun reflected off of her hair, making it shine as if it were polished gold. She held a book in her hand and was reading it casually, not noticing me. Somehow I wasn't surprised to see her there, because I felt her presence there before I even arrived. Her eyes trailed up to me from behind her book, and she calmly set the book down beside her. Her face was slightly puffy and red as if she just stopped crying.

"Hello," she said, sweetly. It almost felt like we were longtime friends that have been hanging out for years.

"Hi," I replied and sat next to her. "Are you okay?"

She smiled and rubbed her eyes.

"Yeah. Just life I guess." I nodded and smiled back.

"Do you want to go to town?" I asked.

She looked up at me with a weird look in her eyes. I suddenly realized what I said.

"N-no, not like that. I mean, do you want to head to the town shops and maybe get a coffee, or something," I felt my face turn red. She chuckled at me and nodded.

"I'd love to, Chie." The hairs on my neck stood on end when she said my name. I've only heard her say it so sweetly in my dreams.

I took her to one of my favorite coffee shops in the middle of the town shops. It was dinky when it comes to actual building size, but you can't beat the atmosphere it brings. We sat down and she ordered a tall hot coffee with hazelnut and cream and sugar. I noted that in my head for future use.

"You're a good hockey player," she said to break the silence as we waited for the waitress to bring our coffee. I smiled and scratched my head.

"You're not too bad yourself. How'd you learn how to play?"

"Just had a knack for it I guess, I never really played," her statement was put on pause as the waitress set down our cups. "What about you?"

"I used to play with my brother as a kid before he left for college," I said and took a sip from my cup. She nodded and took a sip of hers as well. The awkward silence started setting in. My eyes reverted towards her book that she set on the table. "I've never heard of that author," I stated.

She picked up the book and smiled.

"Yeah, she's almost an underground author, but incredibly talented. She has an extremely blunt writing style, which puts off a lot of editors and readers."

"Huh. In the magazine business it seems blunt is better. No one likes reading a writer who dances around the bush about how beautiful or handsome someone is," I replied.

"That's right. Tate said you were a writer for the magazine he works for," she set the book down to pick up her cup again. "Although, isn't it almost one of those… mature magazines? I mean, how Tate describes it that's how it seems." I could feel the heat creep up my neck. She thinks I'm some perv.

"Er, well, the head chief is a female who is kind of a perv I guess, but most of the writers are girls. Tate is only there to edit photos in Photoshop and take up space near my desk." She smiled and brought her eyes to meet mine. I practically melted. I wanted to think of other funny stuff to say so that she could just stay smiling and never stop.

"Do you get to meet any of the models?" She asked. I looked up at her, confused.

"I suppose I bump into them in the office, but not really."

"It just must be nice to write about beautiful girls all day, especially if you're… Uh, you know." She took a nervous sip from her cup. I cocked my head to the side and tried to read her facial expressions. I'm the gay one? She's the one who kissed me.

"I guess."

She set her cup down and folded her hands.

"I'm really sorry. About everything," she whispered. I had to lean in a bit to hear her. "It's just, I have a fiancé and we're going to get married in the summer and I kind of panicked and well… mixed you up in the process."

Inwardly, I sighed. That's all it was, some last minute panic because she was getting cold feet about her marriage. To her, that was truly all it would ever be. I looked back up to her and the corner of my lips curved upwards in a small smile.

"What?" She asked, confused. I leaned forward and traced my finger over her face where there was some left over froth from her coffee. I showed her the froth on my finger so she wouldn't panic that I was just touching her for fun. Even though it WAS fun. I leaned back and stuck the frothy finger in my mouth. I could see the blush creep onto her face, and I wondered if her heart still pounded as hard as it did the first time we met. I wanted to have the same effect on her that she had on me.

"I don't think you should apologize," I said. "Whatever it was, at least it was amazing for me." She bent her head forward, staring at her cup on the table. It was almost as if she was embarrassed. "Do you want to at least be friends?"

I pleaded with her in my mind that I wanted some sort of connection. Even if I had to watch from a distance, I wanted to be sure that I could still be near her presence. Her eyes looked up at me and set on mine for quite some time. My eyes trailed down her face, onto her lips and I felt the heat crawl up my back again. If she could read my mind, she would know how hard it would be for me to keep a distance.

"Okay," she said. I wondered if she felt the same way. Another awkward silence settled in between us. "Do you want to see one of my favorite shops in here?" She asked me.

My eyebrow raised and I nodded.

"Sure."

We stepped out of the café and I followed her. My eyes would slowly trail down to her… assets and then mentally I would smack myself to remind my brain that friends aren't suppose to look and drool over each other's asses. I've never been friends with a girl that I've wanted so much.

She came to a halt outside of a used bookstore. The sign read "Antique Books from Around the World" in big pink loopy letters.

"You really are a book worm, eh?" I said, peering into the window to see the tattered display books. I saw her chuckle and nod in the reflection.

"Yeah, Reo hates it," she said. Immediately my throat tightened up. Damn him. She seemed to pick up on my facial hints, so she grabbed my hand to drag me to the other side of the store's window. "I always wanted to be a book editor, so that I could help publish some of modern day's greatest literary pieces."

She pointed to an old greenish-blue book that was worn on all edges. The title read "Through the Looking Glass" by Lewis Carroll.

"This is my favorite book. I collect first editions and this is the only one I haven't been able to get," she said while looking up at it in awe. "It cost quite a bit of money, and I'd never get the approval to buy it even if I did save up for it now." It almost seemed like sadness weighed itself on her, because her entire body seemed like it was heavier to her. She looked beautifully sad. "When I was kid, I would read parts of this book every day. The cover was so worn and pages would fall out. It was all about this little girl's adventures in some mythical place in her imagination, and I would find comfort in opening the book and immersing myself in that world. Almost like an escape."

"What happened to it?" I inquired.

"Got lost when I had to move in with my dad after my parents split up," she bit her lip and shook her head. "Hopefully one day I'll get the okay to get this copy, even though it's expensive." I nodded and took her hand.

"I bet you'll get it, someday," I said to her. I wanted her to have it so that the sadness in her eyes would disappear. She looked down at my hand holding hers. Immediately, I let go, not wanting to push the boundaries of "friendship". She smiled, sweetly, understanding. I wanted her to have this book.

"I doubt it. Reo wouldn't want to spend this much money on a silly book," she said, as her eyes fell to the ground.

"Weird," I said.

"Hm?"

"I didn't know marriage constituted in someone giving up everything for another. I thought it was more mutual than that," I said, almost with a taste of coldness on my tongue. I didn't like him for making her feel this way. She chuckled with a hint of sadness.

"Then you don't understand marriage."

We started walking back towards her car in a calmed silence. It was like both of us were reviewing over our day and evaluating each other. I could feel her band brush against mine as we walked, and it sent electricity all throughout my body. I only wish she knew what she meant to me. I wish she knew how everything she did affected me in some way or another or even knew that I wanted to push her against her car and completely take over by kissing every inch of her until the sadness left her eyes.

"Do you want to go and do some ice skating? I don't have any plans tonight," she said. I turned my head towards her and smiled. She was letting me have a longer chance to be around her. I felt like I was in heaven.

"Of course. I need to go home and get a change of clothes though, do you mind driving me?" She shook her head and we got into her car. We mostly drove in silence, merely speaking in short sentences about the weather and which streets to take to get to my apartment. I had to try to keep my eyes off her, because without me realizing I'd find myself staring at her. Everywhere. She parked in front of my apartment building.

"It's cold; do you want to come in while I grab some clothes?" I asked her. She looked up at the apartments then back to me, deciding whether she should or not. It was almost as if I was asking her to jump into the lion's den. She bit her lip and nodded.

She kept a fair distance from me as we climbed the stairs to my room number, and I felt her stare burn in the back of my head as I unlocked the door. I didn't want to make her nervous, and I wanted to prove to her that I can be a friend too. I wasn't some crazed lesbian who would take advantage of her and eat her ovaries.

I let her come in first and she gazed around at my semi-messy apartment.

"Wow," she exclaimed.

Nervously, I chuckled and kicked some underwear under the couch.

"Sorry I really didn't think I'd be expecting anyone," I said, trying to make an excuse for the apartment's current state. She shook her head and smiled at me.

"No, I love it. It feels so… real," her last part ended in almost a whisper.

"Do you want to borrow a sweatshirt?" I asked, being the polite friend that I am. She nodded. I went into my room and grabbed a long sleeved shirt and two sweatshirts for the rink and headed out into the living room. I handed her one of the sweatshirts. "Be right back," I said and started taking my shirt off as I went back into my room. I hate changing in front of people, but for her, I wanted her to get a glimpse of me. I wanted her eyes to trail my body. When I got into my room I hit my head on the wall lightly at my stupidity. Did I really think that flashing her my back would sway her to fall in love with me? To leave her fiancé and live with me in Wonderland happily ever fucking after? I sighed and told myself to get a grip. I finished putting on my shirt and went back out in the living room.

She was sitting down when I entered and she looked up at me with a weird expression in her eyes.

_SHIT, _I thought to myself. _Somehow she knows what I was doing and now she thinks I'm some disgusting lesbian pervert._

"Chie?" She said softly. I gulped and wanted to blurt out how sorry I was and that I'd never do it again, then beg her to please for the love of God don't disappear again. "I'm sorry," she finished. I looked at her in confusion as she stood. Immediately I thought she was going to run out the door but she stepped towards me instead.

"F-for what?" She was closer and immediately my heart began racing. She grabbed onto the back of my neck and pressed her lips hard against mine. I felt myself melt into her and I kissed back, parting her lips and putting my arms around her hips. She kissed me desperately, like all the tension that I felt was built up in her too, and now it was being released like this giant volcano. Her hot breath blew into my parted lips, and the hairs on the back of my neck stood on end. She licked my bottom lip and my hands trailed at the end of her shirt. I began to gently tug at it, and thank the Gods that she complied by lifting her hands up for a moment as I slid it off. Her skin was milky white on her stomach and I allowed my hands to explore every inch of her they possibly could. I brought my lips down to her chin, then settled on her neck, gently kissing it as I trailed lower.

I could hear her breathing become haggard as I kissed her stomach. She pulled my head up and kissed my lips again as she slid off my new shirt that I just put on. I pressed her body against mine, allowing the heat to reside between us. Her fingers trailed down my bare back, and with them, shivers followed. She opened her eyes when I opened mine and stared. For a very brief moment, the sadness in her eyes seemed to have evaporated, and was replaced with an excited, happy look. However, it was only briefly then I saw something click in her head and knew immediately she was going to pull away.

I wanted to keep her there, so I tried to keep kissing her but her head fell forward against my collar bone, with her eyes to the ground.

"I can't. I'm sorry." My breathing was off balanced and my head screamed out in angst. She backed away from me, letting me get an entire scale of the almost bare top of her body. Everything was smooth and perfect. She was perfect.

"I need to head home. I'm sorry," she said, softly. I could tell she wanted to stay. She _needed _to stay, but I knew she was too loyal. Too kind of a person. She must have been thinking of what she was doing wrong to him, and in the meantime became oblivious to how I felt with this entire emotional roller coaster she put me on. She put her shirt back on and shut the door behind her. I sighed, and crashed on my couch half-naked.

I knew that I saw she was happier. I saw in her eyes that tiny ping of sadness she carried since the day I met her was gone. And I remembered it being gone the first time we kissed. At the same time I both cursed and loved that damn bench that started it all.

The next day at work I knocked on Fujino's door. I knew that I wouldn't regret what I was about to do as soon as I saw the look on Aoi's face. As soon as I make the sadness fade from her eyes.

"Come in," Fujino yelled from inside her office.

I slipped in through the door, shutting it behind me. She looked up at me, confused.

"You have the article done already, Chie-kun? I only gave it to you this morning. Remember, quality is better than speed," her eyes focused back down to the paper she was writing on.

"Um," I started and shifted my eyes towards the door. I tried to build up the courage by thinking of Aoi. "Modeling. If I do it, can you pay me partly up front? I need a little extra cash this week." Her eyes jolted right back up to me from her paper.

"You're considering it?"

The heat from my cheeks grew onto my entire face.

"Can I get partly paid up front?"

"Of course. However, Chie-kun, you know that I want it to be the best. Meaning, you will be like any other model and in that aspect… partly exposed," there was a warning tone in her voice. It was her way of basically telling me that I was going to be half naked and I wasn't going to try to weasel my way out of it. I nodded.

"I understand."

A small teasing smile crept onto her face.

"Why?" She asked.

"Why what?"

"Why did you change your mind? I thought all hope was lost."

I sighed and nervously smiled.

"Girls can make someone go insane, Fujino-sama," I replied.

The corner of her mouth twitched and she let out a bellowing laugh. I was taken aback and shocked at the sudden show of an outburst coming from the usually reserved Fujino.

"Oh how I know!" She exclaimed with tears in the corners of her eyes from laughing so hard. I somewhat laughed, still nervous about this uncharacteristic behavior. She wiped the tears from her eyes away. "You'll meet the photographer in two days, give me an hour to get the papers and your partly up front paycheck," she said in between chuckles.

I did come back later, and I did sign the papers. I felt like I signed away my soul, but I didn't hesitate for a second. She gave me an envelope that was apparently my pay, and let me have the rest of the day off.

I counted the money and decided it was definitely enough. I didn't walk to the park tonight, nor did I go straight home. I went to that same antique book shop and stared through the glass. I gripped the money I had in my hand tighter, and went through the door.

The next week would be hell at work, and my boobs were going to be "almost" completely exposed to the entire world to see, but for what it's worth as long as I was going to make her smile even for the initial minute…

I wasn't going to regret a single damn thing.

CHAPTER 3 END

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So, as I was re-reading the previous chapters I realized that a lot of the character's greatest moments were in Aoi's perspective, so this time I gave Chie a little bit of the spotlight too (especially since Chie is my favorite, duh!) So this was completely in her perspective. I'm guessing next chapter will be either completely in Aoi's, or in both again, so stay tuned.

As always, if you have any comments, whether they are good or bad, please comment! I love hearing about what other's felt about each chapter, so it does make my day!

I think I'm going to type up a bonus chapter right after I post this, so once again you can find those at my livejournal. You can find my livejournal info as well as my MSN info in my profile. Don't be shy to contact me, I love making friends with my readers!


	5. Bare

And we're back for another chapter. I've re-read some of my previous chapters, and I'm not sure I like how simplistic and quick it all seemed. To me it's like a diagram, such as Chie is point A going to point B and X happens. So, this chapter I'm going to delve a little deeper into some details and expand the character's minds to beyond what is going on at point A and letting it dive towards point C while passing through super awesome point F. Confusing as hell? Sure, but I think you'll see what I mean. So, more than ever, please leave a comment / review letting me know how I did, if you noticed a change and if you did if you enjoyed the change or want to slap me for changing.

Also, just a quick warning that there is some slight nudity in this chapter. It's nothing sexual in anyway, but one of the characters is going to be topless and I don't feel like dancing around the fact that she's half-naked, so I'm going to write very clear that she is. This chapter is still rated T just because like I said, it's not sexual at all, and very tastefully done, but if you have some phobia of reading about the female body, then you might want to skip some sentences. (It's not going to even be that bad)

Disclaimer: I do not own Mai Hime or any of its characters.

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Chapter 4- Bare

"I don't want you seeing that—dyke!" His tone still pierced my mind. After the ice rink, we had an argument about how disgusting Chie was. "She was totally into you!" He would exclaim. He thought that he was protecting me. However, I knew that this was merely him pushing his shoulders back and pounding on his chest, trying to claim his territory. He was threatened by her, probably because he saw something in my eyes when I looked at her. Something he never saw when they were set on him. A part of me felt bad for him because he had a fiancé that would never be with him the way he wanted her to be.

I could only picture what our life should be in his mind.

"_Honey, I'm home!" He would yell as he came through the front door and set his briefcase and hat on the couch._

_I would enter from the kitchen with an apron on, and the house would be filled with the smell of roast chicken. This is when the audience would clap._

"_How was work, sugar-bear?" I'd ask in a sweet tone._

"_Jefferson is on my case. I'm having a hard time closing the deal," he'd sigh. "I sure am in such a pickle." This is when the audience would laugh._

"_Oh no, sugar, you must be so stressed! Let me rub your shoulders and make you feel all relaxed," I'd trail my hands across his broad, muscular shoulders as a light moan escaped his lips. A small smile would curl onto his lips and he'd grab my wrist gently and pull me onto him. _

"_I know something that would help me relax," he would say. A long "Oooooohhhhhh" would escape from the audience member's mouths. _

_A small Ding would be heard, and I'd turn my head and give a bright cheery smile towards the audience. _

"_Hold your horses' big boy! That roast isn't going to take itself out of the oven!" The audience would then burst into laughter as he would put his arms on his hips and smile._

The whole scenario made me sick to my stomach. I never wanted to be a house wife. My mom was always cleaning up after my dad. She'd make the meals, wash the dishes, do laundry, and take care of the kids. It was sad, because she met my dad in college. She was in med school but dropped out when they got married. She would always tell me about how she was the top in her class and her professors said that she had the potential to be one of the finest doctors they've seen. It was something about her having a sharp mind with steady hands and kind eyes. But Chie was right with her observation. Marriage means giving up everything for that other person. Mom knew that, and even though she always hinted regrets at me by telling me how hard I need to work for school, it seems I haven't learned from her because I found myself down the same path. I didn't want to regret anything.

I think that's why I went to the bench that day. I don't know how I knew, but for some freaky reason I sensed that I would meet with her that day. My face was all red and puffy from crying after Reo and I's argument, which I'm sure look incredibly attractive. I wasn't surprised when I saw her walking towards me. I don't think she was in that much awe at the coincidence either. It seemed that mentally, we just sort of told each other to meet up. Maybe it was because there was something in the air between us that needed to be settled.

So I tried. I basically told her that I was just getting cold feet from the whole marriage business, and that was the reason why I dragged her into this. The look on her face crushed my heart. When she asked me if we could still be friends, I said yes as sweetly as possible, praying to the Gods that being near her would help dull the pain.

I finally thought we had it all figured out. It seemed that both her and I would take a step back and just hang out as friends. A realistic part of me told my brain how stupid of an idea it all was, and that being closer to her would make me want to pull her into a hot, wet kiss every five damned minutes.

When we entered her apartment I thought everything would be okay. We were chatting like friends and chuckling like friends. I thought that maybe I could get over her and be the wife that Reo wanted. You know, the wife I was supposed to be.

Then she started taking her shirt off. Her skin was all one tone, smooth and never-ending. Her jeans sat loosely on her waste with a peak of her girl boxers out the edge. Her curves were so defined and perfect, and I felt a stir in my stomach. I imagined my lips pressed against her stomach. I imagined trailing lower.

I had to sit down.

_For fucks sake_

It wasn't going to work. I couldn't stay away from her forever. I was in all seriousness attracted to this girl. She came back out, clothed, and with an extra sweat shirt. I wonder if she noticed the redness that crept up my neck. I wonder if she could read my mind and see what I wanted to do with her. At that very moment, I wanted her naked. Badly.

"I'm sorry," I muttered.

"For what?" She asked me.

Something in my head kept screaming.

_Do it. For fucks sake, do it before you explode._

And so I did. I practically tackled her and she complied. As clothes were pulled off I could feel our body heat slowly force our bodies to mold into one. I think I truly felt happiness. The world seemed so much more beautiful when I was buried in her skin.

The curtains rose. Wonderland, scene one was about to commence.

"_Babe, I'm home," she'd yell as she entered the door. I'd be on the couch with a book in hand, waiting for her return._

"_Welcome home," I'd say through a small smile. She'd collapse on the couch next to me and pulled me into a small hello kiss. The audience was silent. "How was work?"_

"_Bah, you know. Writing about beautiful spoiled brats and how nerdy guys can magically make women fall in love with them," she'd say. The audience would stay quiet. We'd chuckle together and order pizza. I'd tell her about the manuscript I'm editing, and she'd listen intently. Then she'd pull me into a longer, harder kiss and I'd set my book down to wrap my arms around her neck. We'd make love and eat pizza naked, then fall asleep, cuddling. My very own Wonderland._

_The audience would sit still in silence. They didn't approve of this version, but by God I was so much happier._

However, reality smacked me upside the head. The sadness and feelings of guilt flooded back and I bowed my head down. I prayed for me to find courage to be a bad person and leave Reo in the back of my head, but I couldn't find the strength. I wanted my future to be like my mental Wonderland. I loved pizza and I loved her naked. However, I was realistic.

So I did what I was good at in the face of happiness.

I ran.

Now I'm stuck, staring out the window in Reo and I's apartment. I was alone and miserable, knowing that this "Wonderland" of mine would never truly exist. I just decided that I'd melt into the bed and possibly just rot for all of eternity in this one spot, while trying to fall back into the delirium of Wonderland.

But there had to be a knock on the door. It was sharp and foreign, as if it were someone new to the area. A part of me hoped to the Gods that it was her, and that somehow she followed me home and was ready to lift me up on a unicorn so we can ride away on a rainbow into the sunset, preferably naked, and eating pizza.

I opened to door and to my dismay I saw a man in a delivery uniform with a basket in one hand and an electronic device in another.

"Sign, please," he grunted. I signed his device and he shoved the basket at me and left. Real friendly guy.

I sat the basket on the table and peered in, expecting it to be something for Reo from work.

My curiosity perked up a bit when inside the basket was something square wrapped in a small cloth. I picked the square object up, and slowly unwrapped it.

My heart froze.

_Through the Looking Glass _by Lewis Carroll first edition peered back at me. I stopped breathing. I opened the cover, ever so gently, and a small piece of paper fell into my lap. I read it, and tears came streaming down my face.

_Wonderland is right in front of you._

_Love,_

_C._

* * *

The flashes of the cameras were what I saw first. What surprised me was the overall volume of the room. I never knew a photo shoot was so damn noisy. The photographer was yelling what he wanted at the model in a fast paced speech, and then the model would comply by constantly moving around. It was almost comical, because of how the position she was in she looked like a struggling worm under a very hot magnifying glass. However, the humor evaporated when I realized that I'd soon be the worm.

Someone tapped me on the shoulder. I whirled around and was practically a cat clinging onto the ceiling. It was a shorter male with spiked bleach blonde hair.

"Uh, 'scuse me but are you the one with the next appointment?" His voice was very high pitched and had a tiny slur. I noticed that his fingernails were painted. I was going to take a wild stab in the dark, but I assumed he was gay. REALLY gay.

"Er… Yeah I'm Chie," I said and bowed. His eyebrow rose up and looked me up and down.

"Girl, you better come with me quick so we can do something about your hair and makeup," he said and pulled me into a room. Inside, there were a few rows of chairs with mirrors across from them. It reminded me of some sort of colorful barber shop that Mom used to take me to when I was a little kid. I would hop into the chair and spin in it till I felt dizzy, then my barber would trim my hair as he talked about how pretty his newborn baby was. As a kid of course I zoned out, but I always thought there was something… very melancholy about a barber shop. Turns out this room had the same effect on me.

What I assumed was my hair and makeup guy, stuck his face very close to the front of mine. The awkwardness instilled itself, especially when I could tell his eyes were critiquing every single one of the bones in my face.

"First we gotta' do sometin' bout those eyebrows," and as soon as he finished his statement, a pair of tweezers were going at my eyebrow hair.

"Fucking ow," I said through gritted teeth. He "Tsk'd" at me and told me to stay still. I have to admit that I hated how blunt he was and so very careless of the word "pain". The few hours that I had with him felt like an eternity and constantly I had to remind myself who I was doing this for in the first place. I had to get a good clear picture of her very naked in order to not beat this little gay man into a pulp. He would say something about every feature of my face.

"Oh my, we have to fix your complexion."

"Oh dear, we better mess with your hair…"

"Sweetie, how long HAS it been since you've whitened your teeth?"

It almost seemed like there was not a single inch of my body that was acceptable for him. I kept my teeth gritted and kept a picture of Aoi naked in my head to get me through the anger. After a few hours we were finally done, and the makeup / hair guy barely made it out with his life. The barber shop was much more enjoyable in my younger years. I preferred the cheery face of the fat barber versus this bleach-blonde jerk.

Wardrobe came next, and before the girl even came in I was expecting the worst. I didn't understand people who actually WANTED to do this every day. Some people actually dreamed of having every part of their body scrutinized and studied like you were some lab rat. I guess I couldn't keep the disdain off my face, because when my wardrobe manager came in she chuckled.

I looked up at her from the chair. For someone who was in charge of making my clothes look amazing, she sure didn't look the part. She had baggy jeans on with a simplistic t-shirt, and her messy red hair was concealed under a hat that looked like it belonged in England in the 50's.

"What?" I questioned her laughter. She shook her head.

"Oh, nothing. I can just see how much you LOVE this," she laughed again at her own statement. I blew a string of hair out of my face.

"Right," I said.

She reached out her hand.

"I'm Nao, I'll be your wardrobe-chick. Just listen to what I have to say and I won't make this as miserable as possible," she gave me a small wink as I sighed.

She left me to grab some clothes off a rack, and I could only imagine the shit she was going to put me in. Images of flashy red thongs and bras with weird frills popped in my head. I felt sick to my stomach. I had to remind myself to burn every copy of the magazine I could find around town.

She came back with three items. I thought she was fucking with me.

"What the hell is that?" I asked as I peered at the stuff she brought me.

"Your wardrobe, dumbass," she chuckled.

In her arms there laid a black tank top, a pair of guys' boxers and a pair of glasses.

"W—What?"

"You don't know the theme of your article?" She asked, with an eyebrow raised.

I had to go back in my memory log. That's when I realized that Shizuru never mentioned the theme.

"It's… about… dykes?"

Another fit of laughter passed through her.

"For lack of better words, 'chyea," she said and wiped a small tear in the corner of her eye. I sighed and grabbed the clothes.

"Where do I change?"

She pointed down.

"Here."

Blush crept up my neck. I hated changing in front of people that weren't Aoi.

"You better get used to it," she said, reading my facial signs of total discomfort. "That's one of the many things that are great about being a model. You're pretty much naked in front of everyone."

"Great," I griped, and turned my back to her. I could feel her eyes burning into my bare back as I slipped on the simple tank top.

"Now the underwear," she said. It was almost like she was some perverted porn producer and I was the young, desperate porn star hesitantly trying to make a few dollars by showing my goods. I slipped of my pants and underwear and really quickly jumped into the boxers.

I turned around to look at her. My face was bright red.

"Why the glasses?" I asked and pointed to the pair that rested in her hand. "I have my own."

She pulled the glasses off of my head and slid the new ones on. My vision stayed blurry.

"Because they're fake no-glare lenses specifically for modeling," she replied.

"I can't see," I said, which was the truth. Everything stayed blurry.

"That's fine, you don't have to. That's what the photographer does," I think she winked at me but I couldn't tell.

"Let's get you into some loose jeans too for the first couple of shots, then we'll start the real stuff," she said and handed me a big pair of jeans. I slid those on and she made me turn around in circles for her. She whistled at me, making me feel like I was some blonde walking past a group of construction workers.

"I have to admit," she said as she adjusted my hair. "I was wondering who the idiot was that gave you this job. You don't know shit." A small smile came from the corner of her lips. "Yet you have this natural way about you for this specific… theme." I crinkled my nose at her statement.

"What's that suppose to mean?"

She paused and thought about her answer.

"You just have a very… beautiful androgynous way about you, that's all," she took one last look at me up and down. "There. I think you're all set."

She lead me to the center area where I saw the previous model and photographer left, which meant that everyone crowded around me. People were messing with my hair and makeup and telling me what positions to get in. It took me a while to look up and see the one behind the camera was still the wardrobe girl.

"You're a photographer too?" I asked, standing in front of the camera. She smiled.

"Not usually, but your agent requested that someone besides Devon do your shoot. Said you would be more comfortable with a female," she peaked her head from around the camera. "Which I also do at times, yes." She smirked. Blush faded onto my face. Was she trying to do a play on words to where… she was insinuating that she did photography or women? Judging by her expression it could have meant to have been both. It was kind of cute how confident she was. The smirk was adorable, I guess.

Nao wasn't a very bad photographer, at least with the interaction aspect. When she told me what to do and how to move my body, she had a very gentle way about it. She made the entire experience a little more comfortable by inserting some jokes in and making me laugh, and I realized that this whole photo shoot thing wasn't so bad after all. That is of course, until she said one lovely key word.

"Okay now, strip."

The hairs on my neck perked up.

"Excuse me?"

She looked at me from behind her camera.

"You heard me, I said you gotta strip now," I could see she wasn't joking. I took a small gulp. I knew that it was going to come to this. Hell, I wrote the damn articles that applied to most of these fucking pictures. I knew that a lot of them involved nude shots. Even Fujino warned me before I signed the papers.

I sighed and tried to remember who I was doing this for. I lifted the tank top of, exposing my bare stomach.

"Next," Nao said, looking bored. Flames engulfed my cheeks as my thumbs went into the sides of my sports bra. Hesitantly, I pulled my bra over my head and felt the coolness prick my bare skin. Nao kept it very professional and still kept the same aura around us as if I did have my clothes on. Although she tried to make me more comfortable, I kept my teeth tightly clenched because my eyes tended to trail to all the faces of the staff staring at me. I've never been a self conscious person before, but being half-naked around strangers made me fairly uncomfortable.

"Chie," Nao said. I looked back at the camera. "Focus. It's almost over."

I nodded and took a deep breath. I imagined it was Aoi behind the camera, and that it was only her and I in the room. I kept my eyes focused on the camera as I was lying on my back, head turned towards Nao. One arm was across my chest as another was placed above my head with the very tip of my fingers buried in my hair.

"Tilt your chin up, just a tad," Nao directed me. I followed her order and did so. I could tell that Nao was keeping it as professional as possible, but even I could see a tad bit of flush make itself apparent on her cheeks. The corner of my mouth led up into a smirk.

There was one final flash of light. Nao stood up and away from her camera and shook her head.

"God damn," she said. Nervously, I laughed. I put MY clothes on as quickly as I could and was so sincerely glad that it was all over.

"Well, I have to admit that it was as horrible as I imagined," I murmured as I gathered my things. She chuckled.

"Er, I know this is unprofessional and all, but I figured since you most likely won't be coming back for another shoot," she tore a sheet of paper out of a notebook that was resting on one of the hair dresser desks. I peeked at what she was scribbling. It had her name, then what looked like a telephone number. She tucked the piece of paper in my front jean pocket. "If you ever want to hang out, let me know," she said with a small smile.

I thanked her, and felt her eyes trail me up and down as I left. Inwardly, I chuckled. I had no flipping idea that my body could have an effect on someone. I thought back to the afternoon of Aoi's sudden kiss after I flashed her my bare back. Maybe Aoi really is attracted to me as much as I am to her. The thought of it made me smile.

The walk from the studio was a little longer than the walk home from work, but I didn't mind the fresh air. I processed the day and tried to figure out how many of those magazines would be shipped around town so that I could destroy every last one. I stopped by my mail slot to get my mail and shuffled through it as I went up the stairs. Mostly junk about coupons and shit. As I went down the hallway towards my apartment door I looked up from my mail to see her there.

I could see her face light up when she saw me. Did she always do that? Was I missing on her body clues since the very beginning?

She hastily stood up.

"Chie—" She stopped mid sentence and looked at me weird. "Are you wearing makeup?"

Embarrassed, I scratched the back of my head.

"Yeaaaah, it's a long story."

"Er," I could tell she was trying to focus back on the reason why she came. "Why… did you get me the book? I've been awful to you…"

I shrugged and unlocked the door to my apartment.

"Something you said kind of hit a nerve," I said calmly. I opened the door. "Want to come in?"

She nodded without hesitation this time and we stepped inside.

"What did I say?" She asked.

I set my bag down and sat in one of my kitchen chairs, facing her.

"It's just I don't think marriage means sacrificing the things you love for someone. I think if it's real, they'll love everything you love just as much as you do because you adore it so much," I stated. I let my eyes bury in hers. "I saw how you looked at that book, and that made me love the book, and so getting it for you would make you happy, which coincidently makes me happy all the same."

A small smile crept onto her lips.

"I don't think anyone's ever cared that way about me before."

"That's too bad," I said. "Because I do and I'm not even the one that's going to marry you." Quietly, she laughed. "Hm?" I asked.

"I don't understand how I know so little about you, and I've really only met you a little bit ago and yet it feels like I've known you my entire life," she said. "But then I think about it and tell myself that I'm completely in love with a total stranger."

I think I felt my heart jump out through my chest.

_I'm completely in love with a total stranger._

She does feel for me the same way I feel for her.

"And I've struggled to accept that, but you know what?"

"What..?" My voice was a tad bit raspy from choking down sheer relief and joy.

"I don't care if you're a girl or if other people think its wrong," she bit her lip. "I just know that when I'm with you, I'm so much happier."

I smiled.

"Yeah, me too," I said.

"So now I'm just like 'fuck it' you know?" She chuckled. "I know I sleep next to the wrong person and I want to correct that. And fuck, I want to eat pizza with you naked," she laughed at my confused look. "Don't ask." She sat on my lap and pulled my glasses off. I stretched out my neck to meet her lips as she wrapped her arms around my neck.

"I can order pizza," I whispered.

She smiled against my lips.

"Please, for the love of God order some damn pizza," she whispered back.

I told the pizza man to take his time. I didn't want anyone interrupting this.

The entire night felt more like a dream. It wasn't like it was my first time, but I thought because we didn't know each other as well that we'd be more awkward. However, as if it was out of some movie, everything was perfect. It was almost like our bodies were meant to fit together. Her breath was warm against my skin and I was eager to discover every single detail about her that I could. Afterwards, I looked into her eyes and found no trace of regret or guilt. I just saw my reflection, and realized that I belonged here. I hope she saw that in my eyes too. The pizza guy came and we answered the door in a blanket together, giggling like little school girls. His mouth dropped down to the ground and I think his drool gave the hallway some major water damage. We tipped him and he reluctantly sauntered off.

We cuddled on the couch and ate pizza while watching some American TV show that I couldn't even dare pay attention to. I was too busy letting my eyes soak in the picture of Aoi bare in her most innocent form.

It was the most fucking perfect night. I don't think anything could have ruined it. I was in some sort of state of delirium, wishing that we could stay like this forever. But the realist inside of me flashed back to reality and wondered.

_Where the hell do we go from here?_

* * *

And that's chapter four. I want to do a quick explanation of "Wonderland" that was referenced quite a bit in this chapter. For those who have never read Lewis Carroll's "Through the Looking Glass", it's the book version of "Alice in Wonderland". I didn't want the whole Wonderland thing to be super corny, but I figured since it was Aoi's favorite book, it made sense. Thus, since Chie knew it was about Wonderland and knew Aoi loved that book, she knew that saying her Wonderland was right in front of her would make sense without being gagging corny (although it still is pretty corny, but sweet).

Also, for anyone that cares, I created a Twitter account as well as a livejournal. You can find out what I'm up to and where updates are at by following not only my livejournal but my twitter as well. (My twitter username is pookeez)

I've had quite a few fans of my fanfics add me to MSN and I love meeting everyone! So this is a reminder that you can always contact me via MSN, Twitter, e-mail, and Livejournal. If you have any questions / comments let me know!

Don't forget to review and until next time~

Lillium


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